Friday, November 1, 2013

An Allegory

* My son recently accompanied me to the local car dealer. Upon our arrival we were greeted by the dealer salesman (D.S.): "Hi, my name is Ron. How can we help you?"

* Me: "Well, it's time for me to get a new car, and I see the model I've been getting for years sitting right over there on the floor. I'm not really a car guy, so I usually get the basic version, with the power windows and brakes, of course, and air conditioning."
* D.S.: "Yes sir. That model would be just the one you are looking for. No extras beyond what you want."
* Me: "Great. I'll take it. Let's write it up."
* D.S.: "I'm sorry sir, that won't be possible. We don't sell that version anymore."
* Me: "What do you mean? It's sitting right there. So I'll take it."
* D.S. "Sir, we cannot sell you that model. Also, the manufacturer will be ceasing production of that model. Haven't you heard about ObamaCarcare?"
* Me: (with temper rising) "No. So I can't buy the car I always get anymore?"
* D.S.: "That's correct sir. But allow me to show you some of these other models. They have many more bells and whistles than the model you used to buy."
* Me: "I don't need bells and whistles. I just need a car."
* D.S.: "Sir, take a look at this one, please. It has a sun roof."
* Me: "I don't like sun roofs!"
* D.S. "It's also a six cylinder, unlike the four cylinder you're used to. And it has 300 horsepower instead of 200 on your model. Also, it has built in blue tooth and..."
* Me: (interrupting) : "Look, I neither need nor want all these extras. Are you telling me I have to buy one of these fancier models?"
* D.S.: "I'm afraid so, sir. ObamaCarcare requires it."
* Me: "Fine. How much will these fancier models cost me?"
* D.S. "Well, the model with the fewest bells and whistles will be $5000. more than your old model, and it goes up from there. But, we also give you a list of wonderful mechanics, who will take good care of your car."
* Me: "That's all right. I like my current mechanic just fine. I'm happy with his service and his rates are reasonable."
* D.S.: "Well, give me his name and I'll see if he is on the approved list of mechanics."
* Me: "No! I told you I'm happy with him!" (my anger is still rising.)
* D.S.: "Sir, I do not mean to belabor the point, but I'm not sure you've been keeping up with the news. Under ObamaCarcare, each car comes with its own list of approved mechanics and body shops. So, you really have no choice."

* While I stood there muttering obscenities under my breath, the salesman approached my son.
* D.S. "How about you young man? Are you in the market for a new car? And, if I may ask, how old are you?"
* Son: "Well, I'm 27 and in graduate school. So I really do not need a car as I take public transportation. Anyway, I could not afford one, being in school."
* D.S.: "That's a real shame. You see, now that you are 27, you will no longer be able to drive your Dad's car, even if he says it's okay. It's the law. And if you don't get a car, you will have to pay a fine."
* Son (now approaching my anger level): "What do you mean 'pay a fine?' Why would I have to pay a fine for not wanting a car!"
* D.S.: "I'm sorry to have upset the two of you. I'm just trying to inform you of what the law requires. The government wants everybody to buy a car. But some people cannot afford it. So young people like you, young man, who decide not to get a car, will have to pay a fine in order to help people who want to buy a car but cannot afford to do so. That's how it works."
* Son: "That's the biggest bunch of bull crap I ever heard. I should help someone else get a car when I won't have one! I won't do it!"
* D.S: "Maybe I should clarify. You won't be paying the fine to us. You pay it to the government. They then redistribute the money to make sure everyone can get a car. If you don't buy a car, and you don't pay the fine, you will be hearing from the IRS. Now, nobody wants that."
* Me: "You know what. I agree with my son. This is bull crap. I want to talk to someone in corporate management."
D.S.: "I can give you the number of Mr. Jones, our VP of West Coast operations. I can assure you, however, that he will tell you what I just told you."
* I took the phone number and we left.

* The next day I called the VP.
* Me: "I'd like to talk with Mr. Jones please."
* VP: "This is he. How can I help you?"
* Whereupon I recounted everything that occurred at the dealership.
* VP: "Well, what the salesman told you was correct. ObamaCarcare is the law of the land."
* Me: "But, you are going to lose me as a customer. I won't pay those prices for bells and whistles I won't use. Don't you care about losing customers? Why don't you do something?"
* VP: (in a whisper) "Sir, we really shouldn't be talking about this."
* Me: "Why shouldn't we? I said you're going to lose me as a customer! And why are you whispering?"
* VP: (still whispering) "You really do need to keep up with events, sir. I don't know who may be listening in on this conversation. For that matter, for all I know you may be a plant - just testing me."
* Me: "Testing you? What do you mean testing you? Testing you for what?"
* VP: (now barely audible) "You know who enforces ObamaCarcare, don't you? It's the IRS. The White House has made it clear to all the car manufacturers that they want no criticisms of ObamaCarcare. Frankly, sir, none of us wants the IRS breathing down our necks. Look what they did to the Tea Party and other critics of Obama during the last election. Look at Ben Carson, that poor doctor who made the mistake of criticizing the Affordable Care Act. You cannot reasonably expect any of us to take a public position."
* Me: (now steaming) "Isn't this still America? Don't we still have free speech? You know - the First Amendment."
* VP: "Good bye sir. Have a nice day."